Postcard III


Don't you worry my Black Bird

Don’t you worry my Black Bird

Dear Blackbird,


Come be angry with me, I won’t protest. What more can I want more than being rebuked by you because you miss me, or because an arbitrary idiot in the city messed up your mood? Don’t you know how much I wait & love to hear your heartfelt laughter when I ultimately say something amusing or nice? I worry about you… although I know you are strong and can hold out on your own in any situation & you are a fighter. But I also know the shy-frightened-innocent & naughty self that you are that keeps her teddy nearby so that it may protect you from the monsters of the night. How caring you can be I have felt it! And yet how mad you will be  with me if I anger you in any way.

I had made a promise to you that I’d abide by the restriction come whatever may. And I did. But don’t you think this breaking of rules was very necessary? I cannot let you suffer alone. I am just glad I got to know somehow even if it means someone broke some rules in your kingdom! You are the princess and you rule! Won’t you forgive the poor T? He could not control himself and cried right in the office when the rules were broken! Yeah you hold that kiddish whimsy that you wont talk to a bad teddy, and I ain’t loosing out on talking to you.

And yet when you suffer you keep me in the darkness?Why? Whether you tell me about it or not I’ll feel the pain for you. For the entire last few weeks I have been having a weird feeling that everything is not all right. And you could not tell me you are not alright? Don’t you know I will keep mumbling something to make you feel better? Do you it dislike when I keep mumbling just like that? When you are down with head ache or writhing in pain do you think I am enjoying my time and flying on cloud 9? I somehow understand your pain. And if I know about it like  I only feel more sadness along with pain.

Well I am 2000 miles away physically, but in my heart do  you even think I am inches away? I am not…I live in your heart. Don’t you dare think you can make those plans you have in your mind. Just remember there is one person who gets hurt just hearing you are not ok. I don’t feel like writing any longer, just know I am very sad & not at all feeling good. My friends are going on yet another trip. I won’t go… I want to stay here and try to talk to you. I’ll see you very soon, as soon as I can run away from here back to my home.

Sincerely,

your Teddy B. 

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